Cry Me A River
by derivereine
Summary: How far would you go to get the one you desire? Somewhere, there is a way in, even if that way has an obstacle called Matthew. Jeff/OC/Matt Twoshot
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome to my newest two-shot.  
I'm employing a lot of my own logic into some of this, you'll get what I mean as you're reading it.**

**Don't You Want Me? will be up next week sometime, maybe sooner.**

**Charlie xo**

* * *

Some people illustrate their lives with icons, some with pictures. I weave my life with songs that I can relate to or that make me think in a certain way.  
It's the same with Jeff, he's all music and pictures, sometimes words, usually punctuated with "man", like it's in the same category as "but" or "and".  
As I sit here around the fire in Matt's backyard, Jeff and his friends are playing songs on guitars and singing. I know this isn't "the cleansing", as Matt calls it, and the songs aren't "alternative alternative".

That's how most people think of Jeff. Like he belongs in quotation marks.

"Jeff Hardy?" They say, "He's "abstract", and "artist""  
They used to openly mock him, but now they've resigned to doing it behind closed doors.

I have, of course, recognised the song they are playing. "History" by Funeral For A Friend is a song I love with or without Jeff singing, or rather, wailing, the vocals. I wonder if Beth has noticed the way he's staring at me as he sings, which is really very hurtful as the song is practically about rejection.

_"And I don't care for your sweet scent or the way you want me more than I want you."_

As he sang the words, they suddenly became much clearer to me than ever before. I mouthed them to myself and shook my head; I've gone through periods of time where I couldn't listen to this song because it was too real before.  
After all, we all run from reality, even at the best of times.

In reality, I am the ticking time bomb that could tear a brothers bond. I am dating Matt, even though I am practically repulsed by him. It is also true that I am in love with Jeff, and I have been for precisely 8 years, 4 months, 1 week and 3 days. The first time I ever set eyes on him, I was gone. I know he's crazy in love with Beth, even after all these years. Personally, I don't see it, but if it makes him happy then whatever, right?

**Wrong.**

I am not sleeping with Matt and pretending to love him for shits and giggles. Jeff and I are close, he trusts me. I guess you'll be wanting to know who I am, right? Helena Cassidy. I have no last name, at least I do not wish for it to be known at this time; I presume that most believe Cassidy is my last name. It is infact my middle name, and was my Mother's maiden name before she married some kook and left me. I'm Helena after some dead relative, I forget which. Anyway, everybody calls me Layna and I'm fine with that; Layna Cassidy, the product of a one night stand with a famous wrestler. If we were to be technical about my paternity, I'd be a third generation superstar via my "Father". I've probably met him twice in the last five years, my brother a lot more.

That's not even important. Jeff is important. He cannot be related to the asshole I am dating; one who says words in French to make himself look smart, even when they are incorrectly pronounced, out of context or just plain wrong.  
I no longer bother to correct him.

Somebody asked me recently how far a person would go to get the one they want.  
You can never know the reches, confines and limitations of another's heart; it will always be a mystery.  
When you want somebody so badly, to know the truth of their heart is what you believe you desire; it would solve everything.

For those that think that, it is a good job they cannot read hearts, for they would surely fall to pieces if they saw the full truth.  
Often, we settle for second best.

I am not one of those people.

Jeff is the descant soul int he setting sun, with him I can be whatever I want to be. He brings out the best in me.  
If I didn't have so much to pull me back, then I don't think I would ever return from my dreams of him.  
I don't know who gave him a Lifehouse CD and played him "From Where You Are", but I hate that fucker.

It was probably Matt.  
How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways.

I notice Jeff looking at me when he shouldn't, being able to paint my house when Beth said he couldn't and crashing on Adam's couch with me when he had previously said he wouldn't.

I know he likes me, but this should be the final test.  
Matt is going to propose to me in just over a week, I found the ring in a box in his office. He was probably going to give it to Amy, before she made the wisest decision of her life and left him in the dust. Jeff and I are going to Mexico for a few days, so then Matt can get his final evaluation of me from his most trusted source.

For such a smart guy, he can be such a dumb fuck.

**Who's daughter is she?  
Answers in your reviews!**


	2. Chapter 2

We decided to road trip down to Atlanta, before flying down to Mexico. I love road trips, but a road trip with Jeff? Hell yes.  
Now he's on Smackdown, we'll be able to travel together, same as Shannon as Julie. I'm not a wrestler or a Diva, or an interviewer or a mindless slut, I'm a part time seamstress and the hair and make up with my friend Ericka, who mainly works with the Divas, especially on the PPV's.  
That's how I met Matt- I did the make up on the MVP angle. He asked me out to dinner and the rest is history.  
I believe only Vince knows my last name, and of course my brother does.  
As I sit in Jeff's Corvette, the windows down with air pouring in, Ericka texts me.

**LA, Michelle is driving me insane, girl. Just cause I haven't got the budget to finance the amount of foundation her hella huge forehead needs! Screw J yet?  
E2TRICKA xoxo.**

I just laugh and slide my phone shut, making note of the new 'LA' nickname she's given me. I guess I'm responsible for her 'E to the Ricka' one. I love that girl.

"Layna, do you have somebody else?" Jeff's question jolts me out of my daydreaming almost as quickly as I slipped into it.

"No, but that's not to say that I don't like somebody else."

Jeff's look is inquisitive, "Yeah? Adam?"

I laugh before I can think not to; Adam and I are close friends. "No, Jeff. Somebody a little closer to home."

"Kirby?"

"Closer."

"Shannon?" Jeff's voice cracks as I lean over to him and whisper in his ear;

"Closer."

"Me?" Realisation dawned on his face, "_You _want _me_?"

"Uh huh." I mean, what else do you say?

"Man! You had me there!" Jeff clicks his fingers, laughing, "That was a good one Na Na."

I guess that means conversation closed.

* * *

_Jeff's POV_

Oh man.  
I should've seen this coming. I saw it with Amy, and didn't warn him. Now Helena! I can't tell him: he loves her. But as she sits on the balcony, drinking a beer in just a towel after her shower, light practically radiating from her and off her, something occurs to me.

I do too.

* * *

_Helena's POV_

I'm going to give this one last shot. If he doesn't want me after this, then I'll give up.  
People say that you learn nothing from television. Those people obviously never saw the video for "Always" by Bon Jovi, then.  
Jeff likes to draw, we all know that. Jeff especially likes to draw me, and now is no exception as I notice him drawing me now, sketching my outline as I lie on the lounger.  
I bend down to reach my beer, the towel slipping away. He stares and blushes, stares and blushes.  
And, by the time he has reached me, I do not have much work to do.

* * *

Another persons heart is a castle, guarded heavily but for one secret passage that only love can find.  
Love can lay with you in white cotton sheets, on a grass verge and under the stars at night. It often takes you to places you never dreamed you would go.

Love is something that we often stumble over, but close our eyes and carry on oblivious to what we're missing.

You will want to know that I, Helena Cassidy Orton, took Matthew Moore Hardy to be my lawfully wedded husband, until his brother objected, then left me to pick up the pieces.

I no longer work for the WWE or have any contact with the Hardys.

I have set up my own hair and make up business with Ericka and have found love again, once again having to ruin a relationship to get it. Ericka is dating my brother Randy, who split from his wife shortly after the birth of their first child and her twenty thousand dollar a month purse habit.  
I live in Southern California with Brian "Synyster Gates" Haner, no more than ten minuites away from his band members and from Ericka, who lives around the corner with Randy.  
I still love Jeff and I write to him every month.  
One day, I will send those letters.

People ask me if I have learnt my lesson in Jeff.  
For me, there was no lesson to learn, more what I stood to gain or to lose.  
Sometimes I stand on the beach at night, a gentle wave occasionally lapping at my feet, and I look up at the stars.

Always, I wonder if Jeff is seeing them too.


End file.
